A Few of my Favorite Books

Reading is one of my very favorite things to do. It's not uncommon for me to have two or three books on the go at once. Usually it's a textbook, a work of fiction, and sometimes a piece of non-fiction. My trick is to stash them in different parts of the house; one in the living room, one in the bedroom, and one in the bath. That way, wherever I am, a book is within easy reach. It makes reading a much more organic process rather than having to find time to fit it in.

I thought I'd share with you a few books that I find interesting. Down on the lower right bar of this page, you'll see an Amazon carousel of books hand chosen by me. These are books that I have found to be both helpful and particularly thought-provoking. The book by Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your LIfe was introduced to me when I was at a particularly vulnerable time in my life and it made all the difference. The other books mentioned are interesting as well, though certainly very different from each other.

As with any reading, especially non-fiction, it's very important to read with a critical eye. The genre of personal growth is a burgeoning market with new titles and plans for better living birthed every day. The importance of being a savvy and critical consumer cannot be overstated.

When I set out to read a book that is personal-growth oriented, I use a process that really seems to work for me. First, I start by reminding myself to keep an open mind as I read. The hope in reading is to encounter new information that either confirms my choices for how I live my life, or stretches and challenges me to consider new choices and processes. I need to be open to the growth process, so I must remain open to new perspectives as I read.

After I read the book through, I go back to re-read and reconsider any passages I found particularly interesting or challenging. This helps to solidify the information in my mind. As I do this, I pay attention to how I feel as I read. Do the words bring about a sense of calm in my body or do I sense internal dissonance and discord as I process the words? The result of paying attention to how my body feels as I read is a reliable barometer for what this new information means to me and how it stacks up with my value system.

After this step is complete, I take some time to contemplate the information, apart from the book; to see how it "sits" with me. As I go through this process, I revisit how my body felt as I was reading and I particularly pay attention to those bits that caused a sense of dissonance within me. I question if the dissonance is because the information truly clashes with deeply-held values or because it simply stretches me. After a period of some time, I often notice that accepted information is integrated into my actions, thoughts, and beliefs, while information that doesn't manifest some congruency with my values is discarded. This is how I grow.

What I've described is my process. You may have a different process that works for you. My only point is that it's important to critically analyze the reading that we do. So often, I hear people touting that some self-help book is their new salvation only to find that in two months, they've hopped aboard an entirely different and new bandwagon simply because the book promoting it has just hit the bestseller list. New information is always good, because it causes us to examine ourselves, but be discerning in the process.

So there you are, a few of my favorite books. I don't subscribe to all that is within their pages, but it's certainly good food for thought. In the spirit of full disclosure, I do want you to be aware that I am part of Amazon Affiliates, and I do make a bit of a commission on what is purchased. However, I'm careful in what I recommend and opinions appearing within this blog are 100% mine.

Happy reading and please share your thoughts.

The Potential of the Unknown

Several years ago, I made the very difficult decision to leave the organization I was working for. The job no longer fit me and it seemed unfair, to both myself and the organization, to continue in a position that no longer felt right. I was scared. My whole identity had become wrapped up in who I was at work and what I did. My time there was spent well, caring for people, learning, and growing in so many ways. Never did I dream that the growth I was experiencing would soon lead me away and down a path to what felt like an uncertain future.

In the end, after agonizing about it to the point of making myself sick, I took the leap. A year of extremely unsettling uncertainty followed, but I knew deep down that if I had any chance of spreading my wings, this was the only way. Starting over wasn't easy.

Starting over is never easy. We long for what we know, even when what we know is binding us. But there is promise in standing on the cusp of the unknown; the promise of possibility. The promise of potential. The opportunity to construct and create the life we want for ourselves, one brick at a time.

There are a lot of stories just now about people having to start over and begin again because of jobs lost in this economy.  What I find inspiring about some of these stories is that people are finding themselves again. Long lost dreams are resurfacing and though finances are tight, the free time is allowing opportunities that simply weren't there before. People are choosing to consciously reconstruct their lives and it's exciting!

Sometimes, we outgrow jobs and relationships, and sometimes they crumble beneath us and we have no control. Either way, potential presents itself and we must choose how we will weave the threads together to create the tapestry of our future.

The following song is one I listened to over, and over, and OVER again as I wrestled with the decision to leave my job. I wept again as I listened to it tonight. I am grateful I had the courage to leap back then, and pray I will have it when it's next needed. Perhaps this will mean something to you.

Positive Thinking, EFT, Metaphysics, Quantum Physics, or Just What Works?

The single most life-changing thing anyone ever told me was also one of the most simple things anyone ever told me. After a lifetime of struggling with self-doubt, I happened upon someone who helped me understand how to connect what I knew to be rationally true and how I felt. She said to me, "It's just a thought...and you can change your thoughts." Simple, huh? And yet, pretty profound.

After doing some reading that was recommended, I became keenly interested in this concept. But I'm a critical thinker and was careful to consider what was being suggested and whether it was congruent with the truths I had already come to believe about life, most namely, my belief in God. The journey continues for me.

Recently, I came across these two videos by Dr. Bruce Lipton, and found them fascinating. I thought I'd share them with you because the concepts he's proposing seem to make sense to me, though I'm not quite ready to say that I subscribe to all he suggests. But I'm willing to explore. I look forward to your comments.

Radical Failure

Failure is such a harsh word. Often bathed with a patina of tears, it tends to hit deep in the gut when lobbed at us by others, or even ourselves. Nobody wants to fail. We do nearly anything we can to avoid it, and even just the appearance of it. Though, ironically, we are often the first to affix its taunting label to ourselves.

But in spite of all the anguish it delivers, failure is actually a very constructive state. It doesn't feel so constructive when we're face down in the dirt, having just been thrown off the horse, but it is. Failing at something teaches us what doesn't work and forces us to face the plain truth of it. The interesting thing is, if we follow the advice handed down for generations, and "get right back up on that horse," we lose out on an important opportunity. Success may well be an unpolished gold nugget staring back at us from the dirt, but if we hop up on the horse too quickly, we may miss the shiny bit beckoning to us.

Let's be clear though, shall we? By failure, I don't mean a temporary challenge in what we set out to do. Sure, practice makes perfect and we shouldn't give up the first, second, or even hundredth time we aren't successful at something. But I'm talking about true failure, or more precisely, the failure of a situation to meet our needs. When it becomes obvious that something isn't working, perhaps it's best to take a step back and re-evaluate the environment, and ourselves. Is the universe trying to tell us something? Would it be best for us to take a step back and consider a divergent path? Having the courage to face, and even welcome, failure is the trick.

Life has a way of working out if we heed its quiet messages to us along the way. Failure, success, and crisis; all three of these are signposts that seek to guide our journey. But each takes a mindful spirit to interpret. If we are too busy fighting life and attempting to control it, we create a cacophony of confusion that causes us to  miss the messages. We end up spinning our wheels and circling back around, time and time again.

The failures in my life have not been pleasant affairs and each has left me a bit more raw than the last. Yet, they have guided me and taught me important lessons along the way and in the end, I am thankful for them all.  I don't yet throw parties to welcome them, mind you. But I do hope to develop the courage to experience radical failure, for in each lies a gift.

Thank You

Thanks to all of you, this little adventure has gotten off to an excellent start! I've so enjoyed reading your comments and hearing your thoughts, both within this forum and others such as Facebook. We are accomplishing exactly what I intended: thought-provoking conversation that causes us to consider, question, and grow. My hope is that what has begun will continue and flourish.

It seems the right time to do a little housekeeping.  Soon, you'll be able to find a Facebook page for the blog, and I will let you know as soon as that's ready. In the meantime, follow me on Twitter for up-to-date information on posts and other topics. Look for @allthatthenthis on Twitter.

My plan is to post 3 to 5 times a week from this point forward. Keep up the comments and emails so the dialog can continue even between posts. I love hearing what you have to say and will do my best to respond to each comment and email as quickly as possible.

Feel free to pass along a blog link to anyone you think may be interested. A diverse group will only provide us with more perspective as we continue.

Thank you again, and I look forward to the coming days!

Not Likely to Make Me Popular

There are some things you should probably know about me. I'm an American, and I love my country. My Dad, both of them, actually, served in the United States Air Force and they were proud and brave to do so. You should know that I hate what happened on 9/11 on so many levels. That we as a nation lost innocent lives is horrific enough. But that families lost dearly-loved ones in such a violent and heinous manner is beyond pardon. That our security, both as a country and as individual citizens, was snatched from under us as we watched helplessly is unimaginable and yet, true. We were forever changed that day.

You should know that I'm not a political sort of person. You won't find me ranting about politics, politicians, or hear me suggesting that the country is going to hell in a hand basket. My choice is to leave that to those who know more than I. I'm interested in what happens in my country. I'm interested in what happens in the world. I'm not interested in politics.

You should know that I care about people and that I believe human life is precious, regardless of age, ability, or the color of the wrapping. You should know that I believe that a kernel of the supernatural, found in each one of us, necessarily imbues the life that we carry with awe and dignity, and quietly demands reverence and respect.

You should know that I was saddened today.

I was saddened as I listened to the people of my country gleefully celebrate that a man was killed. I was saddened as I read words written by a friend. Words dripping with venom and racist hate as they mocked the fallen man's religion and wished upon him a horrible hell.

Do I believe that the death of Osama bin Laden was good or righteous or holy? It doesn't matter really. This isn't about that. I support my country and our troops 100% as they struggle to keep us safe. I believe it's possible that the families of those tragically lost to the terror that this man wrought may now find comfort and some manner of closure in his death, and I do not begrudge them that. My prayer is that they will find peace. I am in no way defending the man or his acts. Do not misunderstand me.

But I maintain that he was human. I maintain that it is never right to rejoice in a man's death, and I maintain that it is never right to rejoice in what we perceive to be a man's eternal damnation. We lower ourselves to a very base level when we chant and cheer and dance to "Party in the USA" because a man has died.

Let us rejoice that families may now find some sense of closure. Let us rejoice that our world is safer, if we believe that to be so. Let us cheer that our country is strong and successful in its defense against evil acts. Let us cheer if we believe justice has been served. But let us not mock or jeer or pray for a hotter hell. For to do so defiles the very justice that we hoped to mete out.

Stepping Outside the Known

Over the course of the last couple of years, I've had occasion to consider some pretty significant decisions, and to talk with friends who were doing the same. You know the feeling; weighing out whether or not you should do something by mentally loading the weight bars on one side and then the other of the scale in your mind's eye, secretly hoping the scale will bottom out on the side of safety. But I'm convinced that safe isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Sure, safe is what we know and on some level, knowing brings comfort. There is a certain measure of security in being able to walk the halls of "safe" blindfolded, no matter how tight those halls are. We know every twist and turn; when to zig and when to zag. But the walls of "safe" can be confining and at times, very difficult to navigate due to the distraction of "what could be."

I'm suggesting that we dare to consider what could be. That we push ourselves to step outside of the confines of safe into the open world of wide halls where we need light to find our way. Oh, it's definitely frightening and truly not easy, but neither is sitting in a rocking chair at an advanced age, reflecting on life and wondering about what could have been. I think I prefer my comfort as I smile at the memory of a long and satisfying life, void of too much second-guessing.

The truth is, it all works out. We find our way, we figure it out as we go, and in the end, it all works out. The energy that we spend wringing our hands in worry is better spent in leaping and enjoying the adventure that life offers. Yeah, I know that sounds simplistic and I'm not suggesting that we go about life in a willy-nilly uncontemplated sort of way. But I am suggesting that we stop being scared. Fear is paralyzing and prevents forward movement. Get over it. Move on. Try something different. The bottom line is, time passes anyway, no matter what we choose. We might as well have something to show for it in the end, rather than a great big bucket of "what ifs."